On the evening of 26 November 2022, the National Cancer Centre Singapore’s (NCCS) auditorium was bathed in candlelight. Over 60 family members and friends gathered for Remembrance Day to honour their loved ones who had passed from cancer earlier that year as the song “Tonight I’ll Light a Candle” played.
A candlelight vigil was held as part of Remembrance Day to honour loved ones who passed
Remembrance Day, organised by NCCS’ Department of Psychosocial Oncology, was held for the first time not just with the purpose of remembering those who passed, but also to allow grieving family members and loved ones a supportive space.
Support in grief
Family, friends and caregivers go through a period of bereavement when their loved ones pass and deal with feelings of grief, which is a normal emotional response to losing someone close. Social support during this time, can help the bereaved to cope with the loss.
The Department of Psychosocial Oncology saw an opportunity to bring together loved ones going through the similar experience, so that they can acknowledge their loss, freely grieve and give one another much-needed support.
Remembrance Day
Remembrance Day provides a supportive space for bereaved families
Following the candlelight vigil, a short video that highlighted the bonds between family members continue even when a person has passed, was played. After that families and friends were divided into eight small groups to share their experiences. Each group sharing was facilitated by medical social workers and psychologists from the Department of Psychosocial Oncology.
Families and friends also shared memories about their late loved ones and the future they hoped for. The group sharing ended with everyone writing a symbolic message to those who passed on origami paper which were then folded into butterflies. A therapeutic process, the act of writing messages and transforming them into art signifies that feelings of intense grief eventually transforms.
Attendees at the inaugural Remembrance Day expressed their appreciation for the ceremony, which gave then space to grieve and fondly remember their departed loved ones. They shared that they found it helpful to share with others who may be going through similar pain as this offered emotional support and brought them some comfort.
Family and friends wrote messages to their loved ones who passed on origami paper which were folded into butterflies – symbolising that grief eventually transforms
Helping hands
Volunteers Ms Janet Lim Eng Kim and Ms See Mei Lin crocheted butterfly plushies for Remembrance Day care packs
Remembrance Day was made possible by the combined efforts of staff and volunteers who gave their time and talent. Butterfly plushies, symbolising transformation and hope, were crocheted by members of NCCS’ Volunteer Engagement group.
The butterfly plushies and a booklet, developed by the Department of Psychosocial Oncology with information on grief and questions to guide reflection and facilitate the grieving process, were included in care packs distributed to attendees.
Hopes for Remembrance Day
“We hope that coming together for ‘Remembrance Day’ provides a supportive space for bereaved families, who are taking the first steps in their grief journey,” said Tan Yee Pin, Head of NCCS’ Department of Psychosocial Oncology.
“Family members who have lost loved ones to cancer do not have to journey alone; we are here for them if they need support. We hope this annual event helps them recognise that it is natural to take time to grieve and remember their loved ones.”
In addition to Remembrance Day, the Department of Psychosocial Oncology has launched a support group for grieving families and friends in early 2023.
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